The Lion Sleeps Tonight

In the jungle, the mighty jungle

The lion sleeps tonight

In the jungle, the quiet jungle

The lion sleeps tonight

As I’ve never left the United States until the moment my flight took off over the Atlantic a little over two months ago, my passport was quite boring. In fact, it was just a photo of me. Now, I have accomplished another of my goals in Africa: I have enough entrance and exit visa stamps to have moved onto a second page! Hopefully by 2018 I’ll have to be ordering new pages!

The reason for so many new stamps, you may ask? Spring Break!! Not you’re traditional “Spring Break WooHoo” (kudos to anyone who remembers that episode of Friends) kind of trip, though. In fact, it wasn’t spring break; it was fall break, or as some call it here, “10-day vac”. For this trip, I officially made my first foray into the African bush, home of sleeping lions, giant elephants, mighty herds of giraffe, the elusive leapord, the spirity of the Zambezi (the hippo), and more baboons than I ever imagined seeing.

However, 10-day vac was preceded by an incredible set of evenings. I twice, in two days, climbed Lion’s Head for a sundowner. Now that I’ve done it three times, I feel like a pro, able to conquer every nook and cranny without feeling like I’m going to fall off. My climber’s confidence is growing every day, and it’s really getting me inspired to get more in touch with nature once I return home. But, the dream ended quickly, when we had to wake up at 3:15 for our 5:45AM flight to Livingstone, which essentially boiled down to me napping the entire time, including being on the terminal floor in Johannesburg in the fetal position trying to catch any winks possible.

By 1PM we were finally through security and in Livingstone, Zambia! Our driver picked us up, and drove us through what I expected to be quite a large city, as it is the 4^th biggest in Zambia. I have never been more wrong. There are less buildings on main street in Zambia than there are in Congers (and anyone from Congers would tell you that that’s not very many at all). We drove through town so that we could get to our hostel, the Jollyboy’s Backpackers. Upon walking inside I understand completely why it was voted the best backpackers in Zambia many years in a row; it’s not a backpackers, but a luxury resort. From the beautiful pool deck, to the indoor patio & treehouse-looking area, to the great bar, it had everything you needed to go on a vacation without ever leaving it’s doors. After settling down, and having my first experience taking 1 million of any denomination out of the ATM (I took out zKw1,000,000 which is the equivalent of $200, as the kwacha is exchanged at a rate of 4600:1), we decided to stay at the hostel for a bit, until we saw a sign for a restaurant called Fezbar. It was purported to be a Mexican restaurant, with zKw15,000 ($3) margaritas, so we decided to go. Little did we know when we walked in there would be 2 men passed out on the couches. Well, maybe they’re just people who got too drunk there, right? Wrong. It was the staff. The 2-man staff. Fezbar had an indoor area also, where there were painted American sport team signs – the most random, a Baltimore Ravens logo painting above the door. As well as a large screen TV where they broadcast such things as “movies and fashion TV”. So we ordered a round of margaritas, and then another round during our meal. 25 minutes later we still hadn’t received them, so we asked, and were told that we drank them dry off 6 margaritas, so they had to go buy another bottle of tequila, so we had to stay there until one member of the staff came back. Welcome to real Africa. After our meal there we went back to Jollyboys to have some drinks at the bar, where we met the other Americans who were staying with us, who had just come back from the Booze Cruise we were going on later in the week, and they were exceptionally drunk, so the night ended on a really funny night after people started throwing each other into the pool, half-drunk beers and all.

The next morning we woke up, and decided we were going to the Victoria Falls. After taking a cab there, we went inside, and saw everyone coming back soaking wet. Good day for me to where some heavy cotton shorts right? So luckily I was able to rent a waterproof bag, that later I found out turned out not to be too waterproof as my wallet ended up soaking wet regardless (though my camera was fine, which is all I really cared about then). There is absolutely no way to describe the falls that would truly do it justice. It’s no wonder at all that it is one of the 7 Natural Wonders of the World – it’s perhaps the most majestic thing I’ve ever seen. Because we were there during the rainy season, the water level was absurdly high, so the spray began about 10 feet down the path and didn’t cease the entire time we were there. We got to see the Falls from so many different angles along the path, each affording another incredible view, though some were incredible simple because you couldn’t see anything through the white haze of the spray. The rainbows, also, were absolutely perfect – no words can do it justice again.

After the Falls we went back to Jollyboys for a bit, and then decided to go to the Marumba market, a local market just outside Livingstone. It was much different than the market outside the Falls, where someone every 10 feet was yelling “hey brotha, come see what I make” and trying to bargain with you for anything from your socks to a hairtie in exchange for some jewelry or a tapestry or statue. The Marumba market is a local market where people go to buy their produce and clothing. Definitely an interesting foray into what Africa is really like. It was cool to see just how the other half lives. We went back to the hostel after that, and decided to call it a night early because we had a safari the next morning!

In true African fashion, we woke up at 6am only to find out that our safari was actually booked for Thursday, despite our request to have it on Tuesday! After we fixed that minor setback, we were luckily able to reschedule our events for the week, and that afternoon we were picked up for our cooking tour of Zambia! Our guide, Victor, brought us to a local market, where he brought us around, buying all the goods we needed to cook a meal. One of these, in fact, was a live chicken, which I got to watch a friend behead once we got to the cooking spot. Victor and his partners were full of some really cool cultural knowledge, including a great history of Zambia and its people. One of the most interesting things I found out was that its traditional for the women to do all of the work involved in cooking, including the slicing up of the pieces of chicken, which a girl will learn as early as 6 years old. So, we had our delicious Zambian cuisine, and went back to the hostel for a little bit.

At 4PM we departed for our Booze Cruise! After seeing how our friends came back the other night, and with a slight bit of harbored resentment about the misbooking of our safari, we decided to hit the Booze Cruise hard! The cruise went up and then backdown the Zambezi River, from which we could see the Falls in the distance, as well as some hippos and crocodiles. The bar was delicious, and unlimited, so we started our afternoon off pretty slowly, thinking we had a long time. Once we reached our turn around point, though, the boat kicked it into overdrive, and we started throwing them back pretty hard to ensure that we would have an entertaining night. Once we got back to Jollyboys, we were all a little drink, and drank some more, danced around, and went back into the pool. This may perhaps have been the only time when I felt like I was on a real American spring break trip, but it was definitely tamer than most, which is nice, because we had to be up 6AM again.

This time, however, the early wake-up was worth it. That’s because this was the morning when we got to do the LION ENCOUNTER. Lion encounter = walking baby lions in the morning. There were 2 cubs that we got to walk, sisters who were 17 months old. The place we were at trains these lions in how to be wild, lets them develop into a pride, and then releases them back into the wild. I can’t say when I’ve ever been happier in my life. I’ve been very noticeably obsessed with lions and all kinds of big cats for a very long time right now, and I knew that in Africa I wouldn’t rest until I had seen a lion. Little did I know that at some point in my life I would be able to rub the stomach of a 17-month old lion cub. Everyone noticed my elation, especially in the video they made us after with photos taken during the walk. I swear if I’m not featured on their next brochure they’re making a huge mistake.

We decided to spend the rest of the day relaxing at Jollyboys, definitely a much-needed relaxing day by the pool. For dinner we went to a really awesome place called the Art Café. It was founded by a Canadian couple, who after producing a revue of Zambian dance decided to move to Zambia and open a restaurant where they could showcase local culture. Unfortunately, we missed their dance show, but we did get to see some local village musicians perform, which was delightful. Some of my friends even tried eating Fried Worms, but I couldn’t bring myself to do it. I’ve already expanded my palate enough here; worms wouldn’t been too much for me. Then we headed back to Jollyboys and called it an early night since we were actually going on our safari in the morning.

There’s no way to describe the next two days. After being brought to the 4-way border of Zambia, Zimbabwe, Botswana, and Namibia, where we saw a lion of trucks waiting to cross the border (where some will wait for up to a week, because there is only one barge that brings boats across the Zambezi), we made it into Botswana, and began the safari! The safari started with a boat ride down the Chobe River (the lifeline of the Chobe National Park, where we did our safari), where we saw a TON of elephants (including one that tried to start something with us, and so many baby elephants) and hippos, along with many types of antelope and monkeys. From there, we had lunch, and began our first game drive with our guide, Leonard. Leonard is what you call an animal whisperer; he has a 6^th sense for where to find animals. Over the course of the next three game drives, he could take us to see almost all of the animals we cared the most about. This included about 400 more elephants (not that I counted, but I wouldn’t be shocked if that was a correct estimate), a couple herds of giraffe, the most hilarious baboon territory struggle over a table, many many more antelope (more than I really ever wanted to see, but they are everywhere), buffalo, warthogs, which are the funniest looking little things I’ve ever seen, dung beetles, and crocodiles, among a ton of other animals.

There were two moments on the safari that I will never ever forget, probably because they were some of the scariest things I’ve ever done. On our second game drive, we got charged by a very VERY large elephant. When we drove past it, Leonard stopped like he did in front of almost all the animals we passed, so that we could get a good look, and it was super close to us which was awesome. But, it was shaking it’s head in a pretty menacing fashion, so we drove forward a little bit. The elephant then followed our car onto the road, so Leonard drove up a little bit. When he did this, the elephant began to trot. So, we drove a little faster, and the elephant got faster. This continued for about 30 seconds of absolute panic, until we rounded a bend and lost the elephant for good. That’s when Leonard said to us in his distinct monotone “that was a legitimate threat”. One important thing to know about Leonard is that he was scared of nothing, so it was terrifying to have him actually be afraid of an elephant, which he said that had he waited a few more seconds to drive away would have flipped our car over with his tusks.

The second scary moment was also the most thrilling thing I’ve done in Cape Town. We spent almost all of our second day searching for lions, so around 6:30pm, when the game drives are supposed to end, he heard that there was a lion a couple of kays away. So we sped through what must have been millions of dragonflies (which felt like they were harpooning us as we drove through) to finally get to the spot. Leonard stops the car, and just says “remain calm, don’t make any sudden movements”. That’s when I spotted a sole lioness, out on the nights hunt. She came perhaps 3 feet away from our vehicle, looked at it, then started to slowly walked around to my side, where she stood for about 45 seconds motionless. I was convinced she was going to attack, so I was literally able to scream because I knew I was the closest to her, and thus the first that she could off if she wanted. However, she finally started walking again, and laid down for us to take some finally snapshots before we left.

I think, though, that the coolest part of the safari was where we slept. We had opted for the 2-day, 2-night camping safari, which meant that we were camping in the middle of the Chobe National Park. Directly in the game reserve. Our first night around the campfire the guides made us get up so they could show us 2 wild buffalo that were grazing behind our tents. Luckily I was exhausted so I managed to sleep through both nights pretty soundly, but my friends all told me that they heard a bunch of animals throughout the night. It was definitely the coolest first time camping for almost all of us, but probably something I don’t think I’m going to do again anytime soon.

Finally, Saturday morning we picked up and drove back through the game reserve and up to the Botswana border, and took our speedboat back to Zambia, and then drove back to the hostel. After a pretty long nap, I spent most of the day hanging out by the pool, before we decided to go back to the Art Café to do some crafts. We spent an hour and a half doing the most awesome cultural exchanging of my life. While these 2 artisans from villages outside Zambia were showing us how they make their pendants (which we got to help out on a little bit), we just got to sit around and talk about anything and everything, and I had such a great time watching the man sanding my necklace laugh at the pictures of baby elephants that we also found hilarious. Comedy knows no regional boundaries. For dinner we went back to Fezbar one last time just because we found it so entertaining, and then went back to have a fun last night out at Jollyboys. Some of our group ended up heading to bed a little on the earlier side, but I stayed up for a pretty long time talking with these really cool British people that were on their gap years but also staying at the hostel.

The next morning we woke up to regrettably make our way back to Cape Town. For the first time, I didn’t want to go back to Cape Town. Zambia was an incredible place, and I was very upset that I only go to stay there a short while. However, my mind was turned around a bit when I realized that the airport in Livingstone. There is only one gate to leave from, and with 3 flights departing at the same time, the situation got a little sticky. Luckily, our flight only took off 45 minutes late. From there, we had smooth sailing (despite a hailstorm) through Johannesburg and back to Cape Town!